An epiphany about the cold

"Epiphany - I has it," wrote one of my favourite bloggers a long time ago (because as forgetful as I am I can have a brilliant, albeit stalkerish memory when it comes to people and things I obsess over).

So yes. Before I start rambling. I have an epiphany about the cold and why I always get so emo and depressed whenever the weather gets cold.

Are you ready for it? Drumroll please... (thank you)

It's not the cold that makes me depressed... but depression that makes me feel extra bone-chillingly cold. Because somehow, when I have something to do, friends to be around, and warm food in my tummy (because life is too short to eat bad food!)... the cold doesn't seem to bother me quite so much, even when I'm wearing flip flops (because I'm Malaysian like that and wear flip flops everywhere and don't care how chav-y people think it is here) in 3 degrees.

In other news (one of many very British phrases I have now become fond of using... oh no I'm going native!!! Bleh... :P), it's been an interesting three weeks that have passed. After partying for a grand total of three Friday nights in a row, I think I might be ready to hang up my party shoes for good. I don't know how people have the energy or interest to party so hard. But we'll see if I change my mind before next Friday. ;)

It feels like in the past three weeks, I've experienced more of UK life, Middlesbrough life, student life, and just life in general than I have compared to the rest of my time here so far, excluding traveling to London and Edinburgh over the Christmas break. And it's been an amazing roller coaster, drama-filled ride (as my life always seems to be). There's probably lessons in here I'll take away with me to ponder over for YEARS to come that I don't realise at the moment.

But the important thing is, in these three weeks I LIVED. And I no longer feel like trapped and frustrated and like a victim of my circumstances, because these three weeks have been a reminder that my circumstances are largely a result of my choices and perspectives. In three weeks, I've seen the worst of myself... and also the best. And while I've made some choices I'm not proud of, as we all do every now and then, I've made some unforgettably precious memories as well.

In a very sweet birthday video, a friend asked me to go "crazy CRAZY - all outs crazy!" And I have to say, I have. :) Oh you have no idea. :)

Before I turn in for the night, I shall leave you with a quote by author Henry David Thoreau:

"How vain it is to sit down to write when you have not stood up to live."

And some good mood music to suit this post:



This year, is gonna be incredible
This year, is gonna be the one
All the planets are lining up for me
This year, I'm gonna have fun

This year, I'll paint my masterpiece
This year, I'll be recognized
I can feel like I'll fall in love for real

This year, I'll reach the pinnacle
This year, I'll get to the top
People will ask where she get that energy
This year, I'm never gonna stop



You taught me to run
You taught me to fly
Helped me to free the me inside
Help me hear the music of my heart
Help me hear the music of my heart
You've opened my eyes
You've opened the door
To something I've never known before